


Habit

by Avril1128



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Bad Ending, Bad Writing, Hurt No Comfort, M/M, Mental Breakdown, Sad, Sad Harry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-10
Updated: 2020-08-10
Packaged: 2021-03-05 20:27:23
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,532
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25821361
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Avril1128/pseuds/Avril1128
Summary: Louis left, left the completely messed-up Harry Styles- his band mate,ex-best friend,ex-lover alone in that cold l,empty,massive house. Harry is lying on the floor in an extremely uncomfortable position crying. His body is shaking and his eyes are turning into red because of crying. He could never forget the face Louis showed to him when he walked out of the door. What can he say? Disgust? Exhausted? But it doesn't matter anymore. Louis threw the key on the floor,lifting his package and walked out of that door which is full of their memories without even looking at the boy who is having a mentally break down.No goodbye,no last word,no reason,nothing.
Relationships: Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson
Kudos: 9





	Habit

**Author's Note:**

> Let me clarify first I'm not good at writing,I've only joined this fandom for a few months. I'm 13 and English is not my mother tongue so when ur reading,u'll find a lot of parts which might not make any sense😂This fanfic is kind of sad and I hope you enjoy it:)

Habit

Honestly,Harry should have known this day will come eventually,he was just denying the truth. He doesn't even blame Louis for saying these hurtful words which is tearing his heart apart, it's his fault.Harry was the one who started this relationship at first, everyone know a love like this won't last for long, apart from them--two idiots who think they can handle any bullshits as long as they are together,they thought their love was reckless,but they were wrong. 

Louis left, left the completely messed-up Harry Styles- his band mate,ex-best friend,ex-lover alone in that cold l,empty,massive house. Harry is lying on the floor in an extremely uncomfortable position crying. His body is shaking and his eyes are turning into red because of crying. He could never forget the face Louis showed to him when he walked out of the door. What can he say? Disgust? Exhausted? But it doesn't matter anymore. Louis threw the key on the floor,lifting his package and walked out of that door which is full of their memories without even looking at the boy who is having a mentally break down.No goodbye,no last word,no reason,nothing. His head is spinning around and his heart aches like someone just put a dagger in it over and over again. He was such a fool,he gave everything he have, and truly believed that their relationship is something else,but it's only a joke. It's too much for him to handle himself. What is he going to do? Harry's heart is broken,but who is he supposed to talk to?And who is responsible for his heart breaking? Harry can hardly breathe and starts to cough badly. He is so desperate to hold Louis's small but warm hands. But he isn't here anymore. He left,he hates him, they are over and all of them are Harry's faults. Tears can't help but stream down,Harry has never felt worse. 

He needs to call someone, anyone. He slowly stands up with his hand against the wall and walks toward his bed. His cough is getting worse,he covers his mouth with his hand,red fluid clung to his hand,Harry knows, it's his blood. He is sick and beginning to feel dizzy. Harry immediately reach his phone and unlocks it. He tries to find someone to call before he faint and he will. But look through his contact list,all he can see is the name"Tommo". Harry's feeling more and more sick."Should I call him?"He whispers to himself,hands shaking terribly."No...... He won't care. Even if he does,I won't bother his life anymore."He slowly searches L-I-A-M through his contacts. His eyes begin to blur, he's not able to see anything. Harry has no clue if he's clicking the write button or not,all he sees is pale light. Fortunately he can hear his phone ringing."Hello?"A familiar sound speaks. Harry has never needed his friends more than he is now."Harry?"Liam sounds a little bit worried. Harry tries to respond but it's like there is something stuck in his throat. He tries to scream but all the sounds he can make is hoarse sign. "Harry are you ok?" Harry is feeling more and more dizzy,he couldn't concentrate. Finally lose all of his conscious and faint.

"What if someday you don't love me anymore?" The boy with curly hair lying on the double bed,head resting on the older boy's right arm and ask. He can feel the soft breath from Louis,god damm it he loves that feeling. "You're kidding right,sun?"Louis asks in the mildest voice ever,twiddle his lover's curly hair."I'm serious Lou."Harry pretends to be angry,staring at those ocean eyes,praising how beautiful the man holding him,there's no single word can describe him. "I'd rather kill myself"Louis says with a serious face. "But what if Modes-""S-C-R-E-W THE MODEST"Before Harry could finish the sentence,Louis interrupts.In return,Harry gives him a big smile which can easily melt the older boy's heart."I love you so much Harry"Louis says look into Harry's eyes."I love you too,Lou""Now kiss me you fool"He laughs and add,kissing him on the lips.

The unbearable pain forces him to wake up. Harry can't breathe properly, it's like something heavy is pressing on his chest. He looks around and realize he faint and he is in the hospital. Harry has no idea what happened after he faint but it's not hard to guess Liam is the one who brought him here.The door is open. He ignores the terrible headache and tries to listen to the argument outside the door.

"What the fuck is going on with you?Are you being possesd by a bloody demon or something? Get your ass over here or I swear to god Louis Tomlinson I'm going to hunt you down you asshole!"Harry can see a tall man with black hair yelling at the phone outside the door, it's Zayn. It's not hard to tell that Louis isn't in the hospital, Harry's heart suddenly aches terribly again,but he knows he shouldn't give hope in him anymore. He isn't planning to tell his friends he's awake yet,so the boy with curly brown hair keeps watching what they are saying.

Zayn hang up the phone, obviously,he is completely pissed off."That son of a bitch!" He yells."Can't believe he really did this to Harry"Says Liam, sitting next to Niall. Harry can see the tired, disappointment on their faces. He feels sorry for them,he shouldn't drag his friends to this complicated situation."What are we going to do?"Asks a boy with blonde short hair.“I'm going to find him"Liam sighed and volunteers."I'm coming with y-" "No,you should stay here with Niall. Harry needs you"Befor Zayn could finish the sentence,Liam interrupts in a firm voice. "Yeah your right，this must be a hard time for Harry,that poor boy"Zayn nods,Harry can clearly see the sadness on his face. He truly doesn't know what can he do without his friends.

"Your awake!"After Liam left, Niall walks into the inpatient ward,says in a pleased voice. Harry can see he is exhausted too."Hey, I'm sorry I caused you guys so much trouble I don't mean it" "Harry, it's not your fault, give yourself a break. Are you feeling better?" "Yeah I think I'm fine"Harry is lying,he knows his condition isn't getting better at all but he doesn't want them to worry. "Is Louis ok?"He tries to escape himself from asking this question but he can't."Seriously Harry? After everything that asshole did to you?"Zayn says, trying to sound as calm as possible but his voice can't help itself but shaking because of the unbearable anger."I'm sorry I just......I-"The memories between Harry and Louis flash into Harry's brain. Suddenly Harry's not able to breathe again,tears in his eyes once again stream down."I still love him I'm sorry I'm such a fool I just can't....."Before he could finish the sentence,Niall and Zayn hug him tightly."Shhhh it's ok Harry, it's ok. We'll find him."Niall comforts him."But first,we need to find a doctor. Stop lying to us Harold,your condition isn't stable."Zayn walks out of the room for a doctor.

（Louis's place)  
Liam drives for half an hour to get here,he drives through several red lights but he doesn't care.He can't wait to slap Louis's face,but he resist the urge. Why he didn't come while his beloved is in the hospital,hurts. He doesn't know? No,Harry's in hospital is all over the news now,people are guessing for reasons,there couldn't be no chance that Louis doesn't know.He get out of his car and rush into a luxury villa. He knocks the front door in a rush way. He still can't believe what he did to Harry,Louis has always been generous to everyone, not only in the band. He seems to be like an older brother to them. Louis takes care of the boys，especially to Harry. 

The door opens leisurely. A man with thick black circles shows up. "Jesus Christ what the hell is going on with you?"Liam yelled. But Louis doesn't pay any attention on him. "Wanna have some drinks?"The shorter man asks,like nothing happened. Liam ignores him and walk into his room without permission. Dozens of wine bottles，clothes,broken glasses are laying on the floor."What the hell have you done Tomlinson?" " Enjoying life"He says in a despise voice. Liam has to admit sometimes he is dying to kick Louis's ass and he nearly did."What the fuck is going on between you and Harry?"Liam turn his body around and ask Louis with a blame voice."Harry who? Potter?"He taunts.

Before he could see the pissed off face of Liam,he feels something heavy just hits him on his face,his friend just beats him. The shorter man couldn't believe what just happened,he doesn't even know he fell off to the floor.The blood run down from his face."Are you fooking insane?"He yells,but Liam doesn't seem to be regretted at all."Harry is lying on the fucking hospital bed while his life could be in danger at any freaking moments all because of you Tomlinson,and what are you doing? Enjoying life? Listen to yourself! You'd better come to the bloody hospital now and apologize to him or otherwise,you leaves the band. "Harry is in hospital so what?It's not my freaking business. You should blame that boy for falling. You truly wanna know what the fuck is going on? I'm fooking done with the games. Are you that stupid that believe I love Harry and ready to spend the rest of my life with that kid? I must say I'm good at acting am I? They should have give me a fooking Oscar! Grow up Liam!"He yells,throwing a wine bottle on the floor and breaks it. 

The taller man never expected him to say that,he loses his entire hope in him this time.What can he say? So disappointed? So bloody pissed off? Guess it doesn't matter anymore."Before I leave,I just want to say,you don't deserve Harry Louis,you never did."Liam says in a surprisingly calm voice,he doesn't know how did he do it.He run out of his house as fast as he can. So many thoughts flop into his mind.How the hell is he going to tell that innocent boy?This will break him.

After Liam left Louis's house,the shorter man with brown hair sits with his back against the wall,still holding an empty wine bottle.He knows he fucked up everything,he successfully lets everyone he cares hate him.He doesn't want this,but deep down, he knows he has to. This is the only way to protect the boy that he loves. He is too young,too innocent,too delicate for this world. Louis thinks he should be the one who is responsible to takes his pain,so that the boy could live a better life. At least,better than his.Tears streamed down from his face.

（In the hospital）  
When Zayn sees Liam comes back alone,he nearly faints. He doesn't have energy to be angry at that son of a bitch,all he could think about at that moment is the poor boy who is still lying on the hospital bed."Where's him?"Zayn asks Liam,hoping there's one chance that Louis comes.But the taller boy shakes his head. They are both desperate. They instantly look at the boy with curly brown hair through the door,Niall is still talking and comforting with him,trying to makes him feel better.  
Harry hears some noise outside. Could that possibly be Louis? He really feels alive for a second. Liam and Zayn come into the room with that "I'm so sorry"on their faces.Niall is about to say something but he stops. No.....No he will,he will come.Harry's body starts to shake terribly again,with fears in his green eyes."We're so sorry Harry." Zayn says."You deserve a much better person Harold"Liam immediately adds. But nothing can stop the heartache of Harry."Harry...."The blond hair boy tries to touch him,but the younger boy's body violently tremors. "Stay the hell away from me!" He yells,which terrified Niall. That feeling comes again,terrified,anger,the unbearable pain,sadness."Please....Just leave me alo...."Harry uses a calm but shaky voice says,staring at the wall,but before he could finish the sentence,he throws up,with blood on the floor.  
"Holy shit call the doctors!"Zayn yells. The boys are shocked,their mind is blank,it's Zayn who drags them back to reality. Niall rushes out and immediately calls a doctor. Liam and Zayn runs to the bed,Harry already faints again."Harold?!Can you hear me?!"They try to wake him up but apparently it won't work. The female doctor comes and checks his pulse. "We need to send him to ICU. They couldn't believe what they heard,they just wish this is a nightmare and hope they can wake up soon,but it isn't. More doctors come here before the boys could think straight. They carefully put their friend on the stretcher and send him to floor two. Liam,zayn,Niall follow them to the ICU,before they could get in,a male security stops them. "Get the hell away he is our friend!" Niall shouts,they never saw Niall would be that pissed. "I'm sorry but you can't get in."The security warns Niall with a firm voice. "Niall,it's fine,we will wait here." Zayn comforts him. They can see from Niall's eyes,he already been crying for a long time. They all are. 

Three boys just sit on the cold chair in front of ICU,no one talks. They need time to take this series of things,it's too much for them. One second never seems so long.They are exhausted,they haven't sleep for nearly 2 days,but they still insist to stay here. After 2 hours(it feels like 2 years for them)finally a male doctor walks out of ICU room and coming towards them."How is he?"Liam asks with worry on his face."His condition was unstable but we're sure he is fine now. But he still has to stay in the hospital for a couple of days."They've never felt so relieved."Thanks doctor. Can we visit him now?""Sure,but he is still sleeping"Liam opens the door and walks into the room first.The curly brown hair with pale face is still sleeping on the hospital bed."The poor boy...."zayn says looking at Harry's pale face.  
"Is he awake?"A familiar Yorkshire accent appears. Silence in the air. None of the boys turn back to see him. "Leave." Zayn uses a calm voice to say,but you can still hear the anger through his voice."I want to see him,please"How can Louis's voice be so calm? After everything he have done. "I said! Leave!"Finally,he can't control his anger anymore. Zayn turns back,walk towards to the shorter boy and punch him in the face.He doesn't even know how hard he beats him,blood spills from Louis's unhealed wound,they can easily see the pain on his face,but he's just standing there,closing his eyes. No resist,no complain,waiting for his friends to punch him again.No doubt,Zayn is pissed off because Louis isn't resisting. "So that means you're asking for forgiveness? Don't try to be a saint after what you've already done Tomlinson." "I'm not asking for your forgiveness.I just want to see Harry"Louis says with no emotion.Before Zayn could argue against him,Liam stops him."Let him."He says.Although both Zayn and Niall seem to be unwilling to go,but they still walk out of the door,leaving Louis and Harry alone in the room.

Louis slowly walks to Harry's bed and sits on the chair beside the bed. He looks at him for a while,he miss his curly hair,miss his beautiful smile,miss everything about him,but he knows,they won't get back together again,but at least the older boy can gives him a better -by leaving him.It hurts like hell,Louis knows it,but it worth it.He carefully touches Harry's curly hair for the one last time and give a kiss on his forehead.  
"Harry,I don't know if you can hear me or not,but I'm here to say goodbye."He chocks up when he says the word 'goodbye'. "We all know this relationship won't last too long,and you shouldn't have give it so much hope. I know you love me Harry,and I did loved you before." He meant to use the past tense although his heart aches as well."But it's time to face the reality,we can't be together anymore. We both need to move on and start a new relationship.And.....I'm leaving the band. I think it's the best way for both of us."Louis tries to not to cry while he is saying it,but it's so hard for him,tears fall down and drop on Harry's hand,Louis slowly holds his pale right hand."Looking back the memories between us,it's beautiful Harry,you gave me the happiness that I never thought I would have. And I'm sorry I shouldn't have left you alone in the house,I never thought.....It would hurt so bad."He hung down his head,feeling extremely guilty. "You deserve a better person Harold,like Taylor Swift,Kendall Jenner. Not me. We were too stupid to think that our relationship would actually work,but deep down we both know from the very first beginning.I'm sorry Harry,good luck with your life my friend." He slowly moves his body and kisses the younger boy on his forehead——for the one last time.

Louis stands up with his face is already full of tears. He is aware that he has to leave here as fast as he can or else he's afraid that he would turn back just to kiss him on his lips and he's afraid he will never have the courage leave. He doesn't look back,and he definitely doesn't know that in fact,Harry hears every single word he said.Harry doesn't want Louis to leave,he grabed his hand as tight as he can but he was too weak."Don't leave"He wants to scream as Louis walking out of the door,but he couldn't make a single sound."Please don't leave me...."But it's too late,everything is too late. Tears fall down from his pale face,he knows——this is the end.

(4 days ago)  
"You guys can't be like this anymore"Simon Cowell says."Bu-"Before Louis could finish,Simon interrupts with a extremely loud voice which nearly leads Louis to headache,"Don't you dare telling me that you love him or somewhat,it is ridiculous! You guys are famous now,you are celebrities,if you continue doing like this,it would cause a huge financial loss to the whole company.Young ladies love you,do you have any ideas if you and Harry really be together,how much fans will you lose?Apart from this,the hashtag 'Larry Stylinson' already become tending for six bloody weeks,you are losing your fans,we are losing our money.We don't want that,don't we?"Honestly,Louis indeed thought about this before,therefore he has no good reason to retorts him.Simon sees that Louis didn't say anything,so he nods and says"So,today I call you here,is to offering an option."Louis raises his head,he knows this can't be a good one. "If you leave the band and start a solo career,you'll get the same salary as before,even more. You are the oldest in the band Louis,ladies loves you,you will be just as popular as before even if your alone.But if you insist to stay in the band,we will put pressure to him,no matter what way we use,and forces him to leave."  
Louis is feeling dizzy,if he continue stays like this,he is most likely to faint.He supports the wall with his hands,tears fall down from his beautiful but sadly face. Too many thoughts jump into his mind. He loves One Direction,he truly does,it makes him to feel like home,he enjoys performing on the stage with the boys,flirting with Harry,listening to the yelling from the crowd,it is everything to him.But he can't do this to Harry,he is too young to undertake everything. Louis is the oldest in the band,he thinks he should be the one to protect Harry from pressure,abuse and hatred. Probably it will destroy Louis,but it's worth it,as long as Harry is on,he doesn't need to know about this.  
"If you truly loves him Lou,you know what is the best choice for him,you don't want to see him hurt,don't you?So....Are we deal?"Simon looks at the boy who is struggling,searching for a final answer in those ocean eyes full of pain."Yes...."He says with a voice that he could barely hear."Fabulous!You are a smart boy aren't you? I'm so proud of you Louis,I'm sure soon you'll find the love of your life." Simon says with his fake smile,clapping his head while he is standing up. Louis already has no energy to roll his eyes,all he could think is how can he deal with the life without Harry and how to tell him. But after standing there for five minutes thinking,he decides not to tell him anything.He doesn't need to do this,otherwise he could still think that he still has a chance to fix their relationship which could destroy the young boy's career."Good luck with your life,son.And congratulations,to your bright future."

(6 years later)  
In the past few years,Harry decides to starts his own solo career and gains a huge success. He shows his talent to the whole wide world.Girls are crazy for him,they travel around the world,just to ask for his autograph. But what people don't know,there is a man with who silently takes all the pain alone. In public,Harry is the victim,and Louis is the one who hurts him.Even for Harry.But he still can't put this feeling down,he wrote so many songs for the older boy with ocean eyes.

"Now,it's time to welcome the greatest artists in the decade——ladies and gentlemen,Harry Styles!"The host says in a passionate and loud voice,the scream of the crowd grows louder and louder which makes Louis's ears ache even if it's in front of the computer,but he is pleased,he really is.It's a wise choice for him to watches live,he wanna sees him.Louis loves Harris just as how much he loves Louies.The shy little boy already becomes a confident,independent man now.The man jumps onto the stage,wearing his Gucci,literally glittering.He cut his hair,but still looks glorious."Hi,I'm Harry Styles"He smiles and say,his voice becomes much more muture."So Harry,your brand new album Harry Styles sets the world on fire,what is it that always inspires you to create?And,for songs like Two Ghosts and Sweet Creature,apparently it's for someone,who is it Harry?"The host asks with a smirk on his face.No doubt,this question leads the crowd below the stage INSANE. They start to scream again but in a much louder voice this time."Bloody hell"Harry thinks.This question nearly makes Louis laugh,he can see the forced smile on his face,he is glad that he is not the one who is answering this question.  
"Emmm well.....You know it's ah—"He ham and has,trying to find the best answer of thus question. This even leads the Larries more crazy."Yes,I wrote them for a particular person."Finally,he confess knowing he can't lie."This person.....Well he means a lot to me" "HOLY FUCKING SHIT!"Someone yells from the audience. Harry just realises that he said the word 'he'——It was at this moment he knew,he fucked up. But somehow,telling the truth in front of thousands even millions of people really makes him feel a hard rock in his heart finally falls down.The crowd is freaking out,but Harry doesn't notice. He is memorizing，memorizing the memories between himself and that boy who is shorter than him. He misses him,misses his ocean Blue eyes,misses his dirty joker that always makes Harry laugh,misses him flirting with the younger boy that makes him blushing during the interview. Even if he is a super star now,he still thinks the happiest time during his life is the time when he was with Louis,and he would take everything to go back. Money,fame,he doesn't care,he just wants Louis to talk to him.This thought makes his heart aches,when he finally come back to reality,he realises he is crying."Shit shit shit shit"He whispers,rushes off the stage desperately.

Right now,Louis turns off the computer as fast as he can. He knows his heart can't candle this anymore."Jesus,what have I done?"He whimperes and covers his face with his hands,quietly sobbing.He can't recall the scene that Harry just rushes off the stage. Louis definitely knows that those songs are for him,he knows the first time he listens to them,and he cried for a whole night that time."That curly hair fool still doesn't know how to lie,doesn't him?"He says to himself with a wry smile.Louis whips his eyes with his hand and gets up,picks up a pencil on the white table.Then,he grabs his note book and starts to write.......

*You're the habit that I can break  
You're the feeling I can't put down  
You're the shiver that I can't shake  
You're the habit that I can't break  
You're the high that I need right now  
You're the habit that I can't break

END

Skshsjsjjkanhs I finished this for god's sakeeee!By the way,if u have any suggestions plsss tell me,or you can find me in Twitter @Avril1128_ Have a nice day x

**Author's Note:**

> I know I'm bad at writing I know,I did my best already though lmao. Please don't spread hate on anyone pls:)


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